Midterms finished 3 weeks ago and finals (before a 4-month CCNM hiatus, yippie!) are in 4 weeks… but pharmacology decided to have a mid-midterm because of the density of the material. At first, I was really grateful for this because it means splitting up a large amount of material into two separate exams, which to be honest I think a lot of our classes would benefit from. However…. now that the date is approaching I am realizing how difficult it is to study during what my brain thinks is a “prep-period”. I’m still recovering from midterms! You can’t seriously expect this brain to turn back on till atleast April (if I’m lucky). After procrastinating all week I convinced myself that my Friday off will be spent in full-on pharmacology mode. Instead… I made this:
Okay, so minor studying was done this afternoon which I know I will kick myself for later but if school has taught my one thing in the last 14 months (that would be 14 months straight… insane), it’s that I really can’t force myself anymore. I have put faith and trust into my brain-power that I will learn enough and accomplish each goal to the best of my ability, but as burn-out gets thicker and thicker I can no longer force my brain to do anything. I take my 60 minute, 30 minute, heck, 15 minute study bursts and use them to my full advantage with trust that they will add up as enough preparation for the looming exam.
Something else that school has taught me – I bake when I’m anxious. I’ve found a real calmness in the kitchen as of late, going hand-in-hand with my obsession for anything Food Network. Some place quiet that I can mix together ingredients, cook them off, and for the most part get a finished product that I am happy with. No matter what happens I essentially am able to make something out of nothing, and it is a place I am usually successful. Maybe cooking has become an ego boost for me, I’m not ashamed of that. It’s something I know I’m good at, lets me be my version of creative, and reminds me that there is more to life then studying.
I encourage everyone to find their bliss and enjoy time there when stress begins to get to the better of you – it’s more beneficial to walk away, accept your emotions, and let them be. Don’t dwell in the stress, forcing yourself to “read one more page” because you HAVE to learn it all. Clear that mind and get back at it when you feel more open to absorbing the knowledge. I couldn’t keep all the drugs straight, so I packed up my notes and spent an hour in the kitchen – and afterwards I was extremely productive for 2 hours. If i hadn’t left my study spot I probably would have spent the rest of the night staring blankly at my papers crying on the inside about how much I don’t feel like learning this right now. Accept what you can accomplish, because it will always be the best that you can do at that time and that is more then good enough.
Onward…. Chocolate-avocado loaf!
Here is the recipe from Living Healthy with Chocolate: http://livinghealthywithchocolate.com/desserts/avocado-chocolate-bread-2181/
I didn’t use the coconut cream as suggested, I substituted almond milk instead as that was on hand
I find with any gluten-free baking it is best kept in the fridge, and they all usually freeze really well if needed.
I let mine cool enough to slice without tearing it apart and then enjoyed slightly warm with a little butter – soo good!
I’m a sucker for baked goods and the texture of this loaf reeeeally hits the spot. Not yet boyfriend approved – but hopefully his taste buds will rejoice (when he heard what I was baking his response was: “is it supposed to be good?” – hopefully I can prove to him that avocados and chocolate do in fact make a great team)
In love, and health(-y baking!),